Loss Of Your Pet---4 Ways To Allow Healing To Begin

Loving a pet is one of the best experiences life
has to offer, and losing a pet is one of the
worse. Regardless of how prepared we are in our
heads, the loss whether sudden or over time is
heart breaking. Here are 4 things you can do to
cope.

Cry---There's no question you'll do this a lot.
Don't be hard on yourself about this, anf don't
even think about trying not to cry. Crying is a
very healthy way to deal with loss. Anyone who
has lost a pet or anyone dear will certainly
understand and empathize with the deep emotional
attachment that has been transformed by death. I
would say the relationship has been severed by
death, but that wouldn't be accurate.

My 9-year old daughter made an excellent point
this week when our 12 year old Golden Retriever
died. She said, "Even though Carson is not with
us, we will always carry him in our hearts."
Then she looked up at me and asked why she was
suddenly sounding like me.

Your pet will always be a part of you, and even
though you can no longer see it, it will forever
live through your memories. This may seem like
precious little comfort at this point, but time
will help.

Laugh---Laughing releases endorphines in the
brain which ease tension, help us relax, and
make us feel happier. Even in the midst of the
pain, it's probably really easy to remember
funny stories. Let them bubble to the top and
help you feel better even if it's only
temporary. Laughing and sharing memories with
others is so helpful right now, so do it often..

Connect with your friends. Ask them to remember
funny stories about your pet and send them to
you. Make a memory book with these stories and
pictures. This alone with help keep death from
erasing our precious memories over time. With
this kind of keepsake, great memories are kept
alive not only for you but for those who may
never have even met your pet.

My mother-in-law would often share stories about
her childhood dog, Buddy. She used to get a
particularly big chuckle when she would tell us
about the time he swiped a candy bar and left
the paper in a very obvious place. So Buddy has
become immortal, because even though he has been
gone for more than 60 years stories about him
continue to be told.

Talk With Other Pet Owners---These are people
who know what it is to love a pet and to lose
one. They are probably only too happy to share
coping ideas that worked and ones didn't work.
Most of all they are usually good listeners
because they've been in the same spot.

This is also true for people who care about you
and know how important the relationship with
your pet was. They will usually listen patiently
because they feel that it is the only thing they
can do to help.

On a day when everything was reminding me of my
Golden who had just died, I asked my friend if
he was tired of hearing me talk about Carson. He
immediately replied no and said Carson was a part
of me and always would be. The gift of listening
is one of the nicest gifts another person can
give at a time of loss.

Adopt A Shelter Friend---Sometimes the mere
thought of loving another animal seems disloyal,
somehow a betrayal of the love we felt for our
friend who is gone. The truth is that our hearts
have an unlimited capacity for love, and loving
another pet in no way diminishes the love that
we felt and will continue to feel for the one
who has left us.

So I will end with a cliche. But having been
through it three times now, I can say with
confidence that time will indeed make it better;
not all better, just better.


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